I have a confession

I have a confession to make. It involves vinyl. Oh, and an iron.

It's not a juicy confession or one that will get me in any real trouble, but the type of confession that you are embarrassed to admit to anyone else!

I need to preface this confession with the fact that I live with two very short people—affectionately known as my children. I don't say that to place blame, but it's a key element in this story. They are under 4 years old and messy (I don't think they'd mind me saying that, as they seem take pride in their messiness).

Here is my confession: I have a vinyl tablecloth on my dining room table. 

There, I said it.

I know; it's awful. It's always on the table; well, except for Thanksgiving and for special company (sorry to my family & friends). 

Here's the story...

We don't have an eat-in kitchen, but a kitchen that opens to a large eating space and living room. We placed our dining room table in said eating space and it's our only table. It's a very nice wood table in a casual, mission style. We bought it pre-K (pre-kids).

For a long time I covered the table with various cotton tablecloths. They were always a mess and ended up in the wash every other day. What a pain. I finally realized I had to do something to make meal clean up easier. This was a difficult realization for me, to say the least.

I don't live in a fancy house, nor am I a snob, but I love design and beautiful things. Vinyl is not especially beautiful; I think we can all agree on that. I think of hotdogs, ketchup and bugs when I think of vinyl, but that's just me.

But, I believe in design for living, so off to the store I went. I found a vinyl tablecloth in a tannish color with a linen-look to it. Sounds odd, I know, but it was the best of the worst and that's what I look for in my vinyl. 

When I got home I realized I had a problem. The tablecloth (can you call it cloth when it's vinyl?) was folded up in a million squares and when I opened it (our table is very long) there were many, many creases in my new vinyl.

I did what any self-respecting decorator would do—I ironed the vinyl. I don't believe you are supposed to do this, but I absolutely draw the line at a crease-filled vinyl cover on my dining room table. I had already gone to a bad place, but this would be too much.

Did I mention I live with short people? They are messy. Life is messy and I have a vinyl table cover on my dining room table. Thanks for listening, I feel better now.


Steph said...

Ha! This truly made me laugh out loud! Now I will mock you endlessly at the next family function. Or maybe I won't. Because I have a confession too. I don't have a table cloth that actually fits my dining room table. On the rare occassion that we eat at the dining room table, it's either covered with a stained, too short white one and I cover the spots with plates and centerpieces or its covered with one that would fit the table used at the Last Supper. So, your confession is safe with me as long as mine is safe with you. (And the 14.2 million readers of your blog.)

Anonymous said...

Oh the horror! What's next? Plastic slipcovers on the furniture? Just kidding, this was great! I love it! I can totally picture you needing to iron a vinyl tablecloth. I was actually wondering if the story was going to end with a melted tablecloth and ruined iron, but I see you managed to find a way!

Kathleen Ellis said...

How funny! April, you crack me up!
Many years ago, I too, was forced to use vinyl tablecloths,as a result of the three very short, messy people that lived with me....I wasn't a decorator then and it's what my mother always used so, I didn't know any better!
I, too, ironed my vinyl tablecloths when necessary, which was almost always! I would advise you not to follow the "machine wash" labels, however, you think an unironed vinyl tablecloth is bad....you don't want to see one that's gone through the wash!
I do have a possible solution for you....at a fabric store you can sometimes find clear vinyl that can be cut to whatever length you want...you can then cover your table with a beautiful cloth tablecloth, put the clear vinyl over it and...voila...a table that can be wiped clean and looks beautiful!
No confessions required!